Perhaps one of the most important gifts a parent can give a child is teaching them to be confident. Of course, there’s a fine line between confidence and arrogance. For instance, teaching children to make justifications or excuses for every mistake will certainly leave them able to defend their pride quite readily but unable to truly connect with others as part of a team.

I often think: I want to raise kids who love Jesus and take responsibility. For me, that seems like a great combination for confidence too.

As much as I wish I could teach my kids all of life’s lessons one afternoon, that’s not reality. Parenting and teaching is a marathon with lessons coming in small doses over long periods of actually living.

Let’s consider then, how healthily boosting a child’s confidence can be achieved, what that even means, and how this can help your child grow up believing in themselves but also humble enough to know where they could improve. (Yeah, at 41 years old, I am still learning right alongside my kids.

Positive Encouragement

Positive encouragement is essential when caring for our children. We must make sure they feel as if we’re noticing their efforts, such as sharing toys with a sibling, taking turns, or even trying to unload the dishwasher. Of course, it’s also nice to compliment our children and help them feel good about their behavior. I know, it’s hard sometimes, especially with my personality that naturally seems all the room for possible improvement! I do want to praise my kids in our everyday moments because I know it’s valuable.

Socialization

Socialization is an essential part of making sure your child develops healthily. They can often get this from the best childcare services and schools – those that understand how children work in a social environment, how positive cues can increase their confidence, and how exposure to other children can help them develop healthy life skills.

I’m grateful my kids’ school believes in teaching more than academics and aims to equip students to grow into Christ-following people.  Yes, sometimes involving other people in our lives means we have to manage conflict, especially with other kids are who also learning. Socialization is so valuable even the hard parts are worth it.

Discipline & Reward

Discipline and reward go together quite nicely when we make use of it. (Yes, more than 13 years into parenting, and I still have to remind myself to be consistent!)

We use a marble jar for two of our kids. They earn marbles for completing daily tasks and chores, such as getting ready in the morning, cleaning their rooms, unloading the dishwasher, being kind to their siblings, and not complaining about dinner. Of course, they may also lose marbles for not completing tasks or behaving as expected. They can cash their marbles in for treats, extra screen time, or the freedom to choose dinner. This teaches them the foundational aspects of responsibility and reminds them of what they can achieve.

How have you seen a child’s confidence boosted?