family

On learning and following Jesus together

July 1, 2019 by Kristin Leave a Comment

As a 40-year-old woman, I really love reading devotions. I like hearing stories that help bring scriptures to life. I like themes that apply to my life.

But gathering my family for devotion time often seems stressful to me, especially after we’ve had full days and are spending time together after dinner.

We talk about Jesus often. We serve together. We are involved in church together. Yet my momma ears totally perked up when I heard about a new family devotional: “The Very Best, Hands-On Kinda Dangerous Family Devotions: 52 Activities Your Kids Will Never Forget” by Tim Shoemaker.

After flipping through the book without my kids present, I get excited about the word “activities.” Doing something with my kids comes more naturally than sitting around the table trying to teach and lecture them.

I immediately noticed a few things about the table of contents: The activities are titled, but the themes are also noted immediately after. Some activities that may require extra supervision and precaution – like one involving a potato gun, chemistry experiment, or make-shift balance beam – are noted with one symbol while themes more appropriate for children 12 years and older are marked with another.

Like Shoemaker says in the introduction, parents are supposed to protect their children, provide for them, and prepare them for their futures. All of that is best built on a spiritual foundation and resources like this creative family devotional book are wonderful guides.

I appreciate how Shoemaker offers fourteen tips to making devotions work for your family. It’s good to be reminded these are object lessons, not drawn out lectures that bore the kids. He encourages parents to focus on doing weekly devotions and creating a habit that works best for their schedules.

Stay tuned because I’ll be back with more glimpses as my family moves into our backyard and living room to learn more about what following Jesus is about together.

About the book

The remedy to ho-hum, not-again, “Do we have to?” family devotions. Regular family devotions are important. Unfortunately, they’re often . . . boring. But what if devotions looked less like sitting still and listening to someone read and more like, say, electrocuting a pickle? Or converting a leaf blower into a toilet paper launcher? Or lighting toothpaste on fire?

“The Very Best, Hands-On, Kinda Dangerous Family Devotions” is a 304-page paperback book published by Revell (May 21, 2019).

About the author

Tim Shoemaker is the author of fourteen books. He has worked as a volunteer with youth at his local church for more than twenty-five years and speaks to thousands of students at public schools. He’s a popular workshop speaker at Iron Sharpens Iron Men’s Conferences, Moody Pastor’s Conference, Focus on the Family, and GREAT Homeschool Conventions. He lives in Illinois. Learn more about him and his books at his website.

*****

I received a free copy of this book in exchange for a review as part of the Revell Reads program. These opinions are my own.

Stories from the Porch in May

May 29, 2019 by Kristin 21 Comments

May days are my favorite but these May days were especially crazy days. That’s about all the introduction necessary, so I’m going to dive right into the recap.

Highlights

I love my birthday and entering this new decade (hello, 40s!) hasn’t bothered me. We had a great weekend at the lake with four of my dearest friends. (Want to see pictures?) A group of school mom friends celebrated another morning with breakfast. I was really filled up with love, which ended up being exactly what I’d need to carry me through the coming weeks.

Four days after my actual birthday, my dad went into cardiac arrest and never recovered. He passed away two days later. I had a complicated relationship with him, but this past weekend my mom, my siblings, his brother and sister, and I remembered the good parts – how he was innovative and creative as an educator and created an environment at the schools he led so teachers and students thrived.

Between my birthday and dad’s death, Cate turned 12 and we celebrated the second weekend of the month with a Harry Potter birthday party. (Stay tuned because I plan to blog about that!) Plus there was Mother’s Day, which is when Greg snapped the picture I shared above.

The third week of May meant the end of school! There was a day trip to the Nashville Zoo with Ben’s class one day. Then we picked up the big kids from school on that Friday and headed up Lake Geneva, Wisconsin.

Jockey Being Family is a foundation of Jockey International (yep, the underwear company!) that supports adoptive families. We connected with JBF when we were in Washington, D.C., for the Angels in Adoption event and were glad to get to know more about how they connect and support families like ours. We were one of five families honored at JBF’s annual fundraising gala and golf tournament. I’m going to blog more about this soon too, but it was a wonderful weekend of being cared for just when I needed a vacation. (And here are some pictures!)

Favorite things

Water Wow coloring books – Rachel is really into these Water Wow books and they keep her busy! Using just water, the pages can be “painted” and then when they dry they can be painted again. And again. And again. She’s been coloring in fairytale and animal books, but I just ordered some others, including one about letters and numbers.

Slugs & Bugs books – Slugs & Bugs music has been my kids’ childhood soundtrack. When creator Randall Goodgame expanded the gospel-centered fun messages from songs to books, I knew I needed them. I shared more about them in a review post.

Pan fried fish at home – When we were at Kentucky Lake with my friends for my birthday, the guys – both the grownups and the kids – caught enough fish to feed us lunch before we all went our separate ways. It was delicious and so fun! Then Greg and Ben went fishing with a friend on Memorial Day, and they caught enough catfish and crappie to feed our family for more than one meal. I pan fried it for dinner on our porch – talk about holiday perfection!

From the bookshelf

“After Anna” by Lisa Scottoline – I picked up one afternoon when my kids and I had a few extra minutes and decided to spend them in the library. Over the next two days, I read it in parking lots when I arrived early, during my son’s soccer practice, while I was waiting for the kids to get ready for bed, and before I fell asleep those nights. Obviously, I was gripped by the story and characters. Told in a before-and-after back-and-forth sequence, the way the story unfolded was well done and kept me completely invested. There was a twist I totally didn’t see coming, which propelled me through the ending.

“What I’ve Done” and “Secrets Never Die” by Melinda Leigh – I’ve mentioned this Morgan Dane series before and was happy to dive back into the fourth and fifth installments. I love the characters’ continuing storylines and like the quick-read mysteries that are told from the perspective of a private investigator and defense attorney.

“The Middle Matters” by Lisa-Jo Baker – I was really excited to be on this launch team and read an advanced copy of this book. I absolutely loved Lisa-Jo’s last book, “Never Unfriended.” I enjoyed this one too. Having just turned 40, I related to so many chapters. This book officially releases July 23, but you can preorder it now and there will be goodies to come. Stay tuned because a full review is coming.

“The Orphan Daughter” by Cari Noga – I really enjoyed this one about a 45-year-old woman who is named the guardian of her 11-year-old niece she doesn’t know well. While several of the storylines involve loss, the book is a good reminder of how people’s stories intertwine to heal. And even better, this is a free read for Amazon Prime members.

“Where the Crawdads Sing” by Delia Owens – Cate gave this to me for my 40th birthday and I’m glad I had to get into it. The writing is lovely, the setting is inviting, and the main character is captivating. I’m not quite finished with it, but I’m really enjoying it.

On the screen

“The Village” – I binged this after it had already been on for several weeks, and I really loved it. The show centers on a group of neighbors from an apartment complex whose stories intersect and overlap. I cried in more than one episode, but I really am looking forward to a full season of this show.

Tell me about your May days.

*****

Reflections on living & dying

May 16, 2019 by Kristin 10 Comments

I knew I wanted to gather some old friends to celebrate my 40th birthday. Four dear friends (and three of their husbands and kids) joined my family at my lake house for the first weekend of May. They brought gifts, memories, and all the food we needed to feed our party of 23 people.

Jaclyn, Sarah, Katie, and Bekah hadn’t all met before, but I have histories with them that span decades, literally. Some of our stories have overlapped, but I knew this was the right group of people to gather together.

Starting in 1990, Katie was my next-door-neighbor-turned-best-friend for all of middle and high school and we remain friends across the state who wish we were neighbors. Bekah and I also were friends in middle and high school. We swam together, she introduced me to country music, and we continue to gather at Christmastime and other times we have extra time when we’re visiting my mom in Louisville. (Fun side note: I encouraged her and her now-husband to date, so they blame me and thank me in the same breath. I’ve actually known her husband Barrett longer than anyone who was at my lake house that weekend!)

Jaclyn and I met in college and had intersecting friends starting in the fall of 1998. We actually got closer after college, got married the same summer, walked through infertility and all the early days of motherhood literally together, and now miss each other if we go too many days without hanging out. Our husbands and kids are tight too. Sarah walked into our church in May 2009, pregnant with Davey who would become my Ben’s first friend, and we’ve basically been friends since. She’s since moved four hours away, but we have an ongoing, never-ending text conversation that brings me so much joy.

Jaclyn and Katie put together a book of blessings and memories from all kinds of people in my life. Jaclyn gave me other goodies and helped organize the whole weekend. Sarah gave me a felt letter board with a sweet message already displayed. (The quote is a reference from a book about friendship by Melanie Shankle that Jaclyn, Sarah, and I like to quote to each other.) Katie made me a T-shaped shelf that’s already hanging on my wall. Bekah bought my dinner when us girls went out for Mexican food one of the night’s together.

Our boys fished and caught enough bluegill and catfish to feed us lunch on Sunday. The older girls made friendship bracelets, had a sleepover in the basement one night, and helped us keep track of the little girls. We went on some boat rides, laughed at memories, told back stories, and ate well.

My soul was so filled with these
new memories with old friends.

The celebrating continued on Monday when some of my friends I know from my kids’ school gathered for breakfast together. It was such a sweet way to begin the new week celebrating some more. Forty certainly had me reflective and craving all the quality time with people I love.

I wanted to celebrate with my people, but God knew I would need to be filled to the brim with love and support as the week continued. God saw beyond my 40th birthday.

My dad went into cardiac arrest the evening of May 7 – four days after I turned 40, one day after Cate turned 12, and five days before Mother’s Day. He passed away about 35 hours later, on Thursday, May 9. (Here’s his obituary.)

He had been without oxygen three different times – for an undetermined amount of time when he went into cardiac arrest, on the way to the hospital in the ambulance, and again in the emergency room. His body never recovered and I watched him stop breathing while hooked to a ventilator and lots of medicines in an Indianapolis hospital.

I haven’t written much about my dad here because our relationship was complicated. For years, I’ve grieved not having the kind of relationship I wish we had. My dad and how I’ve long longed for his approval and attention were the subjects of conversations in counseling. I’d forgiven him and tried to share my life with him, even from a distance.

Regardless of the complications, he was my dad. Right after I was filled from my birthday, I found myself unexpectedly grieving. As Dad was unresponsive in the hospital bed, I learned things about his life in Indianapolis I didn’t know. Even my grief has been complicated and in the days since his death, I’ve found myself beneath a cloud of emotions.

With three kids, the end of the school year, and my everyday life here, I have been able to step out from beneath the cloud, but then when I’m not distracted anymore, it’s still there. Grief is tricky. And I’m so grateful I was filled to the brim with love and support before I had to begin to navigate my dad’s death.

I have questions I wish I could ask him. I want to hold onto hope for a little longer. I remember him as an innovative educator who created an environment at an elementary school for most of my childhood and then a middle school just a little farther down the road that teachers, parents, and students loved. He excelled in his profession.

Three of the friends who gathered at my lake house knew my dad. We had actually talked about some childhood memories involving him just days before he died. Looking back even a couple of weeks, God was preparing me. I didn’t realize it then, obviously, but, for as unexpected as the timing was, I also found comfort in his death being sandwiched between so much life.