To commit your heart or not? There is much debate in the adoption world about when you throw your heart into the mix … upon first sight of that referral picture? Or not until the court date? Homecoming Date? Share your thoughts and experience!
For me, I was fully committed from the day in mid-January 2007 that we saw our baby girl on the ultrasound screen when we were at the birth mother’s 25-week appointment. It was the first day we met the birth mother and the day we all agreed to proceed after some previous initial phone conversations.
A couple people continually cautioned me that she may change her mind or something else could happen. Of course, that was reality. But my heart was trusting the birth mother and process so much that I proceeded with everything I had.
That’s how it had to be for me. Like in all of life’s moments, we couldn’t control the details, but we trusted God to continue taking us through the process to which he had obviously led us. There were many reassurances along the way that probably only spoke to my heart. I couldn’t really explain them to the people who were being cautious.
I knew Cate was supposed to be our baby. We named her on the way home from that first appointment/meeting with the birth mother. The birth mother referred to her as our baby.
I know international adoptions, and some domestic ones, have a whole host of uncertainty because there are so many more variables. But speaking from my experience, I had to commit to this baby girl (and the birth mother), and that meant throwing my heart in the mix early.
Cate was born 15 weeks after I threw my heart into the mix, and she’s been with us every since.