If you’ve been around me for even just a little while, you’ve probably heard me declare I’m not a pet person. And I’m not, at least not really. But we currently have two cats, four kittens, and a dog. And I’ve learned maybe I’m a bit of a pet person, albeit a picky pet person. I’ll tell you more about the dog later, but, for now, I want to talk more about the kittens. 

We got Winter aka Winnie in January after another cat we had disappeared. We wanted Raya to have a friend, so a friend of an acquaintance of mine saw our request for a new cat on Facebook. This couple had been feeding a stray cat for a couple of months, but they didn’t have plans to keep it. So we drove up to a stranger’s house and got ourselves a free* cat who was probably about 3 months old. 

* No cats or other animals acquired without payment are actually free. There are shots and food … and a heated cat house, just for example. This is perhaps the first life lesson: Nothing is truly free. 

We estimated Winnie would be old enough to be spayed in April. I had in my mind to do that after Spring Break. But about that same time, we noticed her getting a bigger belly. My kids told me she was either pregnant or had worms, so on April 29 (well after she should have been spayed) I took her to be checked out. The vet felt her belly and said it was definitely kittens, not worms. Good news, I suppose. “She’s pretty little and I think I feel a couple of kittens.” The vet was right to assume that was good enough for me and I didn’t want to pay for an X-ray to determine how many and how far along they were, you know, INSIDE OUR FREE CAT. 

Cats could take over the world. 

I quickly learned some basic cat pregnancy facts, thanks to Google. Cats are pregnant for 63-65 days. That’s nine weeks, folks. And guess what? Cats can go into heat every 2-3 weeks. Do the math and consider they don’t go through menopause. That’s so many possible litters! Basically, cats could take over the world. Now I know why Bob Barker insisted on telling everyone to spay and neuter their pets. It’s fine advice, but a weird ending to “The Price is Right.”

Don’t worry, we will get Winnie the Not Free Cat spayed once the kittens are weaned. 

Life is always worth celebrating. 

Apparently, cats can be spayed WITH THEIR KITTENS IN THEM. Y’all, if you had asked me what I thought about household pet abortion a few months ago, I would have probably not committed to a stance. But when someone mentioned this to me, I immediately thought, “ABSOLUTELY NOT.” Yeah, I thought just like that, in all caps. I guess I have a stance. 

Instincts are fascinating. 

The morning after we adopted Balto, a husky/lab mix 5-year-old dog, from an animal shelter, the cats were acting weird and hissing when Ben took his new dog out to pee. I understand they weren’t fans of the new resident INSIDE OUR HOUSE, but they also hadn’t reacted with hissing the night before. 

Turns out, Winnie had given birth to one kitten on the porch swing. We all got excited for our ONE NEW KITTEN. Well, turns out my 8-year-old girl witnessed the next TWO KITTENS being born on the porch swing. We wrongly assumed Winnie was one and done because she cleaned up her afterbirth mess. Apparently she did that between each birth. Even so, we thought she was done after three because of the way she was relaxing. 

The kids left for their second-to-last day of school and I went back into the house to see what I was going to do with this new-to-us dog. Balto stared at me while I worked on my computer and finally relaxed on our tile kitchen floor instead of the dog bed I’d bought for him. After a bit, I decided to check on Winnie and her new babies. 

THEN THERE WERE FOUR. I double-counted to make sure. Winnie was a champ and did exactly as God created her to do. 

Mommas need a little space sometimes. 

Winnie and the kittens – who would have names but they all kind of look alike – go outside during the day. And when I say “go,” I mean we move the dog bed that became a cat bed (thanks, Balto!) that is covered with a Christmas blanket from the bathroom to the porch. Winnie sits with them and then will leave after they’re all settled. She doesn’t go far, just far enough that her babies aren’t climbing or sucking or falling or sleeping on her. All mommas need a little break sometimes. 

So do siblings. 

The four kittens – who our animal-loving friend tells us are all girls – often climb all over each other, wrestle, push to get the prime nursing spot, or sleep very closely. But a few times I’ve found them distinctly spread out not touching. 

Speaking of siblings, Rachel is working on convincing her dad to keep one – JUST ONE! 

Rachel named one DJ and asked her why, thinking the two letters would stand for something like Donna Jane. But she means DJ as in disc jockey because the kitten bobs her head up and down because she’s still top-heavy. Really, so do her sisters. We also have had a Midnight and Snowflake, you know, related to Winter, who has made her home on a Christmas blanket, but they look enough alike we forget which one is which. 

If you want one of our FREE* kittens, you could name her whatever you choose. 

* By “free,” I mean I won’t require payment of you. But I do expect you to feed it and possibly even buy it a heated cat house so it can live a cushy life on your porch. Even spoiled outdoor cats hunt. Instincts, I tell you. Plus, you’ll probably want to get her spayed before you contribute to cats overtaking our world.