Kristin Hill Taylor

Seeking God as the Author of Every Story

How to teach responsibility

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This week I had all sorts of things on my to-do list: Schedule an oil change for my van. Set up daughter’s online banking access. Run these errands. Text certain people. Have kids mow the grass. Order a birthday cake. Get paint off the dining room table. Do laundry. 

Yes, that’s life. But it’s also being responsible. It’s a lesson I definitely want my kids to learn. I want them to take care of their hygiene, their mental health, their physical well-being, their spiritual lives, and even their belongings. While documenting real life, I want to teach them real-life responsibility. 

Encourage responsibility 

Teaching kids about taking care of things is an important life skill that should is taught throughout the years at home before they have homes of their own, where I’m not going to make morning routine lists and chore charts or offer incentives for being responsible. 

At our house, two of our kids have routine lists to go through each morning and evening. It’s certainly not a perfect process, but it helps me remind them of what they need to do every day. Included in their routines are cleaning up after themselves. I want them to care for the house we have and the things that belong to them. I want them to clean up their dirty clothes so I can wash them and then they can put them away. 

Encourage kids to take some ownership. Let them put away the silverware, even if it’s messier than you’d do it. (Yes, I’m totally talking to myself here!) Give them chores they can do regularly. 

Teach value of belongings & people

There are many ways to teach children about the consequences of being (or not being!) responsible. My husband and I have tried all sorts of strategies in this area – some more successful than others. Recently, my son broke his Gabb Watch. Honestly, not being able to communicate with him when he’s not with me is a little inconvenient for me, but I’m not replacing this broken item. Taking care of this smartwatch was his responsibility. 

It’s okay for our kids to do without luxuries when they have all they truly need. Their toys, extra clothes, band instruments, technology devices, and sweets are all treats. 

More important than things are the relationships within our household. I want my kids to value each other. The other morning one child was calling another child mean names, so the consequence was to clean two of the toilets. Our home is a safe place so sometimes people’s reactions are unfiltered, but I still want us all to strive to love one another well. 

Lead by example

My oldest child, who is a sophomore in high school, recently opened a checking account. I want to teach her how to balance an account, have healthy spending habits, and understand the value of earning money before she’s living on her own. Teaching responsibility like this is important while children are still under our roofs. In our house, we talk about money in a context that hopefully helps our children understand God has been gracious to us, my husband works hard, saving is important, and belongings and experiences have a monetary value. They know about grocery shopping, eating out, and sharing what we have with others. Experiences, like being part of a soccer team, also encourage character traits, including responsibility.

My husband is an entrepreneur and his ideas have rubbed on me after 20 years of marriage. And now my oldest daughter has started her own business, Backroads & Blooms Photography. She’s been selling some flower photographs she took. I’m helping her promote it online, but she does the printing of photos and ordering frames. She keeps track of income and expenses on a spreadsheet. So many lessons on real-life responsibility right there!

My husband and I want to live these ideas out in our own lives so our children witness responsible living. We do our own chores around the house, but we’re always grateful to include them – in both the lessons and the work!

Purging items is good

When it comes to being responsible for items, another important lesson is purging is good! We can’t hold on to every piece of paper that comes home from school, shoes that don’t fit anymore, or toys that they have outgrown. Sometimes we throw things away; other times we give them away to someone who can use them. When my children were younger, I would rotate toys in and out of their closets so they would often feel like they had something new to play with on a rainy day. We wouldn’t open every new birthday toy on the same day, but wait for another day to spread out the joy. 

Sometimes when children are having a hard time figuring out what to play with, try taking away some of the clutter in their room and see if that helps. It’s important that parents help their children develop their creativity by giving them space to play and explore. Plus this helps them appreciate what they already have. 

How do you teach responsibility in your home?

How to document real life

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For so many parents, raising happy kids is the priority. While that’s important, it’s certainly not everything. Yet, in all the brokenness of the world, I want to point my kids to Jesus and document our (mostly good) memories. I want to remember the good. 

Take lots of photos

I love snapping pictures of everyday life, trips, and special events. Of course, sometimes the kids get distracted or aren’t interested in capturing the same moments. I’m thankful for the “live photo” setting on my iPhone so I can go back and choose the best snapshot of the moment when kids were likely moving around and making faces. A photo burst is also helpful with this. 

A photo burst function takes up a lot of memory, which means that you need to be swift in dumping it on your computer so you have more space on your phone. But rather than it clogging up your computer, whether it’s a laptop or a MacBook, you can use software such as free MacBook cleaners to guarantee that you are able to streamline this effectively. Also, hello, iCloud. 

Photo books

Photo books are a logical extension of taking great photos. If we are constantly looking at pictures on our phones, we can almost lose the sense of what the photo is there for. It’s a good idea to get into the habit of printing out your photos on a regular basis. I like designing photo pages in the Project Life app and then printing these pages and other photos for my walls at Persnickety Prints. 

My kids love to look at these scrapbooks too and then I find myself telling them extra details from the stories. What a sweet way to add to their memories! 

Other ways to document life

While photos tend to be the biggest aspect of documenting family life, I also capture memories in other ways too:

  • Birthday books. These are books with pages for each birthday. I add a photo from their party and fill out the questionnaires about that celebration. It’s a simple but fun way to capture birthday milestones and what each child is like at that age. (I have one of these books for each kid.)
  • School books. Like the birthday book, this one has a few pages for each grade. It’s a great way to document kids’ school experiences, friendships, favorite subjects, and field trips. Plus there’s a pocket where report cards and other mementos can be saved.
  • Words note. Especially when kids are little, they say they funnies things. I started a note on my phone for these things. I just list funny, wise things they have said over the years and date each entry. I think I’ll eventually print this and put it in their baby books. 
  • Line-a-day journal. I started using this journal five years ago and love it. Each night, I write down a couple of sentences about our day. Each page has space for five years, so it’s fun to look back on the previous years. In my fifth year, I’m already looking forward to my new journal in January. While this started as something for me, it definitely captures family traditions, habits, and memories. 
  • Baby books. My kids have unique stories because we adopted each of them as newborns. Traditionally baby books didn’t always work, so I found baby books I could take and part and used certain pages in binders that I turned into baby books. These binders also include their adoption stories, which I’ve updated with details and meetings with bio families throughout the years. 
  • Books. While it’s not the usual way, I also have documented my kids’ adoption stories in a self-published book called “Peace in the Process: How Adoption Built My Faith & My Family.” I also documented some everyday life we share with others in a book called “Bringing Home More Than Groceries: Stories about Gathering & Nourishing People.” 
  • TimeHop. Social media understandably gets a bad rap sometimes, but I love capturing memories on there today so I can see them in my TimeHop memories years later. I love a good side-by-side photo comparison! 
  • Creative mementos. I hope to have things like an heirloom to pass along to my children as they grow up and begin documenting lives of their own. Things like T-shirt quilts, special photos, video compilations, and special dishes are creative ways to document life. 

Life is full in every way – but this is one area of which I’m not willing to let go. Sure, it takes some time, but these are some simple ways you can incorporate documenting memories in your real life as you’re living it with your family. 

Laundry talk

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Let’s talk laundry! And, yes, that’s a live look into my laundry room.

I’m thankful to have a laundry room separated from the rest of my house. I can even close the door when I want to ignore the chore! The room is mostly dedicated to actual laundry, although the same room also houses a utility sink, our extra fridge of mostly drinks, and shelves with cleaning supplies. It’s right by the door people use, so it’s a convenient, functional space that works for our life. 

Certain things make a laundry room most effective: storage spaces, the right appliances, and a safe space for manuals (so you know where to look when your washing machine won’t spin correctly!). 

Quality machines

I replaced my washer and dryer a few years ago, and I got a deep washer that allows me to do large loads of laundry. I got the matching dryer that also accommodates the large loads. The side-by-side option works great in my space, but considering stacking appliances is also a good way to go for a smaller space.  

Counter space

I had a counter installed in my laundry room a couple of years ago, and it truly makes folding laundry much better! On a good day, I can fold as the loads finish in the dryer. Or I can pile the load for when I have time to deal with it. This counter space keeps me from piling the clothes elsewhere in the house while they await my attention! I even use the counter/bench space to organize socks – especially when the loose socks bin is too full for my liking!

Great storage

My counter is the right height for my laundry baskets to fit underneath it. I also have shelves above my washer and dryer for the detergent, stain sprays, sock bins, beach towels when it’s not pool season, and other household supplies. 

Baskets

Each person has a laundry basket for dirty laundry in their bedroom and then brings their dirty clothes to a laundry basket in the laundry room. Plus there’s a basket in the laundry room for towels. I wash laundry by person, so the sorting is done on the front end. Then when the clothes are washed, dried, and folded, my kids can put theirs away! 

Hanging space

Near the counter is also a space for hang-up clothes. I find it I hang shirts, dresses, and Greg’s work pants as they come out of the dryer, everybody’s wardrobe looks better. I don’t like to iron, so this is an important step for me! 

What about your space helps you tackle this chore?

I won’t go as far as to say the laundry room is my favorite room in the house, but it’s definitely practical and I’m grateful for the space to serve my family this way. And if you’ve been here, you’ve probably grabbed a cold drink from the extra fridge. 

Now, it’s time to go move around some loads and tidy that counter space!