• Hospitality adventures

    ByKristin adventure, books, community, faith
    God has made each season beautiful and appropriate in its own time. - Kristin Hill Taylor, Bringing Home More Than Groceries #morethangroceries

    I was a little nervous about moving to the country, where friends and stores aren’t quite as convenient. “Living out of town” in small- town lingo meant we were fifteen minutes away instead of three. I grew up in a subdivision with one entrance where I befriended certain neighbors and knew plenty about the other ones. I spent four years of college living in a dorm with my best friends in my room, through the shared bathroom, down the hall, or no farther than across campus. After college, I lived in apartments in Kentucky’s two largest cities. Even in small-town Murray, I lived in two different houses off the busiest four-lane where I could walk to the park, restaurants, and stores.

    I wasn’t sure what a change to country scenery would do for our social life, but the move felt right. We’re still here in a house surrounded by woods and creeks. And, guess what, friends have shown up for small group meetings, game nights filled with roasted potatoes and Settlers of Catan, lunches with chicken salad and other adoptive moms.

    Rachel learned to climb stairs before we moved to the country and how I was grateful for a single-level home for my fearless girl to explore. She walked in the living room four months after we moved in and hasn’t stopped getting into things yet. She runs in the wide-open fields and loves riding through our woods and down the logging road in our Kawasaki mule.

    Four years after we moved, we spent much time at home during the worldwide coronavirus epidemic. I loved my days at home, where I could drown out the chaos of the world and rest in peace at the creeks and walks down tree-lined paths. When I ventured to town to get groceries, I brought anxiety home with me. Our world shifted that spring and I’m thankful our country home calmed my heart, even though we did miss opening our doors to others during that time.

    Maybe a move eight miles outside a small town doesn’t seem significant, but for me it has been. I learned dreams change and God binds together his people. I know God has me where he has me for reasons I’ve experienced deeply and ones I don’t even know about yet. …

    We didn’t live here in the spring we bought this property, but we stopped by to check on things periodically. Living here when the grass and trees become greener brings healing and adventures. Now I know where the daffodils pop up, often in February, and I wonder if they’ll really survive March. Somehow they do.

    Adventures don’t always come easily to me because I like order, but I’m part of a family that’s full of adventurers. And now I live in a place that beckons me to come out—out of my house and out of my comfort zone. My kids are growing up here, where the stars are easier to see and the trees shelter so much life. Since we’ve moved to the country, they’ve outgrown many pairs of shoes and pants, lost their teeth and Nerf bullets, and moved up so many notches on the growth charts.

    I’ve grown up too. Greg and I have had some of the best years of our marriage here in the country, where my soul feels more relaxed and the pressure to keep too-quick a pace is less. I’ve bought muck boots, know the best entrances to the creek, and keep an eye on the turkey and deer who like to call our yard home too.

    Spring on our property and in my soul makes it seem like life is always changing and being made new. But my faith remains in a constant God who faithfully ushers me into a connection with Him and my people in all the seasons. Hospitality allows us to adventure because we’re anchored to where we’ve been, where we are, and the unknown that’s still to come. Through it all, God is unchanging and asks us to seek Him all of our days.

    *****

    Happy Spring, friends! In honor of the new season blooming in our lives, I wanted to share an excerpt from my book, Bringing Home More Than Groceries: Stories About Gathering & Nourishing People. I also have a pretty download to encourage you to open your home and heart to those around you, regardless of the season. Learn more about the book and hospitality here.

  • How to grieve broken friendships

    ByKristin community, faith

    We don’t talk enough about the grief that comes when a friendship ends. There are no casseroles dropped off or sympathy cards in the mail. Often, there isn’t even a clear moment where things ended, but rather a slow drifting apart, a hard conversation, or a sudden silence that stays.

    Yet the grief is real.

    Friendship breakups hurt regardless of why.  These are the people who knew your stories, your inside jokes, and your prayers. They walked through seasons of life with you. When that relationship changes or ends, it can leave a quiet ache that’s hard to explain but impossible to ignore.

    Actually grieve 

    One of the hardest parts of a friendship breakup is feeling like you shouldn’t be this sad. In my experience, saying,  “But I have other friends …” is tempting. But friendships, like people, are unique. So grieve the loss of this person in your everyday life, the change in seasons or circumstances, and what used to be. 

    The friendship mattered, so the loss does too. My counselor and I have been working through some old grief affecting me in new ways. Given my tendency to write, she’s encouraged me to journal and write letters. In at least one case, the letter can’t be sent, and another letter may eventually be sent. 

    Grief is part of this world, which is broken and waiting to be perfected when Jesus returns. Sometimes that brokenness looks like having a hard conversation with a friend who then distances herself or a dear friend moving away.

    Don’t rewrite the story 

    Friends influence who we are. Reflection on a changing relationship is important, but we don’t need to replay every conversation and wonder what we could have done differently. If we obsess with that, we’ll find ourselves stuck. 

    Not every ending means someone failed. Sometimes people grow in different directions. Sometimes boundaries change. Sometimes God uses separation to protect us, even when we don’t understand it yet.

    You don’t have to rewrite the entire story to justify the ending. Two things can be true at once: the friendship was good, and good can come from its shift. 

    Surrender to God

    God cares about this loss, even if it feels small compared to the deaths of loved ones or broken marriages. One friendship isn’t a global pandemic or natural disaster, but it matters. 

    Scripture reminds us that the Lord is close to the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18). That includes the heartbreak of relational loss. Bring your disappointment, confusion, anger, and sadness to Him in prayer. Be honest with God, who created us, knows us, and can handle our emotions.

    Perhaps forgiveness is necessary. Maybe reconciliation is possible. Regardless, peace that passes all our understanding comes from God alone (Philippians 4:4-7).

    Guard your heart

    After a friendship ends, it can feel safer to pull back from others generally, but guarding your heart doesn’t mean closing it off completely.

    Learn from the loss of your friend, but also trust the healing process and God’s promise to complete His work in us. 

    Christ followers are called to fellowship with others because together we are the body of Christ. God still uses community to grow us, comfort us, and reflect His love.

    Honor the friendship 

    Even in the pain, honoring the role a friendship played in life and growth is wise. The most faithful thing we can do is release a friendship into God’s hands and trust Him with the outcome, whether that means reconciliation one day or peace in permanent distance. This surrender doesn’t erase the memories or influence but rather makes room for healing and God’s provision. 

    Grief doesn’t disappear overnight. Some days will feel lighter. Others may surprise you with a wave of sadness when you least expect it. This isn’t different from death, although sometimes the reality of the friendship loss among the living sparks ongoing pain. 

    God is near. And He is faithful to bring new growth, even from hard places. 

    *****

    Friendships are one of my favorite gifts from God, but that doesn’t mean it’s always easy. I wrote a book called “Created for Communion: Discovering God’s Design for Biblical Friendship,” if you’re looking for more encouragement on this subject. 

    God authors the stories on our porches – in every season. If you haven’t already, please subscribe to  #PorchStories emails to receive them about every other week.

  • Be influencers for Jesus

    ByKristin community, faith
    2 Comments

    I recently hung out with my college-age daughter and her friends. They got me thinking about influencers while we were chatting about social media, probably because two of the girls are marketing majors and another works for her dad’s marketing business. 

    They referenced some “influencers” they knew and jokingly called me an influencer. 

    But I started thinking: aren’t we all influencers with different platforms and audiences? Maybe our audience is our kids. Or our friends. Or classmates. Or lots of followers on Instagram. Or maybe an actual auditorium. Regardless, we are all influencing someone.

    I remember my late father-in-law saying that if we didn’t teach and train our children, someone else would. Same idea. Everyone is being influenced by someone and influencing others. The important thing is to be selective about who you listen to. The world is so loud. Social media can be chaotic. Families can be complicated. And relationships have so many layers. 

    Truthfully, God calls Christians to be “influencers” for Jesus — and has done so long before social media was trending. Here is how we can use our influence for good.

    1. Be the light.

    Matthew 5:14-16 says believers should shine like a light in the darkness so others see God’s goodness through their lives.

    2. Be salty.

    Also in Matthew 5:13, Jesus says His followers bring flavor and preservation to the world. Salt changes whatever it touches. So do faithful believers.

    3. Make disciples.

    In the Great Commission in Matthew 28:19-20, Jesus calls us to go and “make disciples.” Influence by helping others know Jesus – not forcing, but inviting, teaching, and walking with them. Influence in God’s Kingdom happens mostly through relationships, not microphones. We influence by sharing life with people, praying for them, asking real questions, sharing our faith naturally, and coming alongside others.

    Influence, better known as “discipleship” in the church, is slow, personal, and powerful.

    4. Live a life of Jesus’ love.

    John 13:34-35 says people will know we belong to Jesus by our love – not by our arguments, our clever comments, or even our theological knowledge. When we forgive quickly, give generously, listen well, and serve joyfully, people take notice. Love speaks volumes in a noisy world.

    5. Be an example worth following.

    Paul writes, “Follow me as I follow Christ” (1 Corinthians 11:1). People are watching us when we endure hardship with hope, choose honesty over convenience, and make decisions that honor God. This is sanctification, and this is becoming a living example of Jesus to the world.

    6. Use gifts for God’s glory.

    First Peter 4:10-11 says believers should use their unique gifts to serve. Point to Jesus and influence by using your talents – teaching, encouraging, writing, sharing, creating, and leading.

    7. speak grace.

    Colossians 4:5-6 encourages believers to speak with wisdom and grace. It’s not always easy & natural, but we can influence others with our words online and in person by being thoughtful, gentle, and truth-filled.

    As you can see from this small example, the Bible calls Jesus’ followers to influence the world not through popularity, but through authentic connections, truth in love, and a life that resembles Christ alone. Influence isn’t about followers; it’s about faithfulness. And I’m thankful to see that among my girl and her friends. 

    *****

    God authors the stories on our porches – in every season. If you haven’t already, please subscribe to  #PorchStories emails to receive them about every other week.