I was going to cancel #PorchStories this week {again} because I knew y’all would understand. Many of you have been praying for my boy, who sustained second-degree burns to his face and hands 11 days ago.
First of all, we got an excellent report when we took him to a follow-up appointment Tuesday morning at Vanderbilt Medical Center.
The burn unit staff was pleased with Ben’s healing and cleared him to go back to school and resume most of his regular routine. It will be a couple more weeks before he plays soccer. We will still wrap the tops of his hands until those wounds heal a little more, but we’ve moved on to using lotion on face and fingers. We are amazed and thankful for how he’s physically and emotionally responded to these injuries during what’s been a hard week filled with so many good things.
Plus, mother-in-law had the girls so Greg and I got an early-morning date with our boy. We extended our time with a pitstop at Target and an early lunch before we resumed our normal day.
But back to the porch. I needed to come here and tell you something about the stories we share on porches, around tables, in texts, and on social media.
They matter.
“But we just kept showing up. … Because when you tell your stories, you start to recognize yourself in the stories of others. You start to discover that you are both, in fact, inside a shared story.”
– Lisa-Jo Baker in “Never Unfriended”
Our shared stories matter.
The characters and circumstances aren’t always the same, but the common threads of exhaustion, fear, joy, and hope matter. Those {and others} have been the emotions of my last week and a half. Yet we welcomed people into our real life – when the floor wasn’t swept, most of us weren’t showered, and exhaustion was our close companion.
I let a hairdresser friend pick up Cate from school and cut her hair when they got here.
I needed help encouraging Ben to do his hand and face exercises so as the wounds healed his motion progressed too, so I reached out to a friend from church who does physical therapy with nursing home patients and said yes to a friend from school who used to do rehab work with stroke & cancer patients.
I said yes to another church friend who organized a Meal Train and the friends who signed up to bring us food.
Another friend got to be Ben’s home health nurse.
Other friends sent muffins and candy and cards. And then many stayed to pray and play with my boy.
I know I wrote about community the other day. But I can’t stop thinking about how blessed we are to have so much goodness in the midst of a hard week.
Not long before Ben’s accident, a friend said to me: People talk about friendship taking two people, but it really just takes one to invite the other.
It’s true.
Sure, one does the inviting and the other does the accepting, but really it just takes one to spur on the other.
And that’s the beauty of friendship.
Often times I’m the one who does the inviting – to lunch, to conversation via text, to whatever other social event I’m happily organizing. But this time I got to be the one accepting others’ help and love. Truly, I was reminded that gathering ourselves together regardless of the circumstances is the epitome of community.
Dear friends, let’s be people who invite others in.
And let’s also not afraid to be the ones who accept invitations from others. We’re all better that way.
*****
I know I’ve mentioned “Never Unfriended” by Lisa-Jo Baker in multiple posts recently, but it’s a subject that’s near and dear to my heart and one that keeps weaving its way into my actual life. I was on the launch team for the book and received a free copy, but I would recommend it even if I spent my own money on it because it speaks truth and encourages community that matters.
{Read the previous related posts How Community Heals and Initiate Peace.}
Surprise! Today I have a copy to give away to one of you! I spent my own money on this paperback copy because I really want to share and couldn’t decide with whom I wanted to share. So, friends, tell me in the comments how you’ve been blessed by an invitation into someone else’s life or how you’re hoping to extend that invitation soon.
A winner will be randomly chosen Tuesday, April 18.
*****
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Sorry to hear about your son’s injury. I’m glad you’ve had so many people to help you by offering love and practical help. We see the importance of community so clearly at times like these.
Thanks for your comment & kindness, Lesley!
I’m so grateful God put people around you to help….and that you had the courage to say yes!
Praying for continued healing and support for your family!
Thank you, Becky!
First of all I am blessed to hear that Ben is doing well. And, the girls. And, the parents!
I have had friends rally around me so many times I’ve lost count – and I think I have done a fair share of the “ministry of presence” – at least I sure hope so.
xo Have a blessed and glorious Resurrection celebration!
I have no doubts you’ve been such a good friend to those near you because you’ve been a good friend to me across the miles. Thanks for being here, Susan! xo
I’m truly happy reading about your son’s recovery. Thank God for His precious Mercies.
I like that you said friendship involves Inviting another.
That’s true!
But this Easter i have the precious opportunity of being with family.
Happy Easter in advance
God bless
Thank you, Ifeoma!
Hey Kristin, so thankful to hear about your son’s continued recovery and how y’all have been loved on through the process! I have been in a season lately of learning what friendship really means, because as an adult it really is challenging sometimes! I have one friend in particular who sought me out. I didn’t think I needed another friend but boy, did God use her in my life recently! She has become one of my “heart friends” in a relatively short amount of time. I recently ordered another book on friendship called Messy, Beautiful Friendship by Christine Hoover and am excited to read it. But I’ve heard sooooo much good about this one too! Thanks for sharing your recommendation and giving us the opportunity to win
I’ll have to add that book to my (long) list. Those friends we least expect often prove to exactly who we needed in our lives. I’m glad you’ve had that experience. Thanks for being here, Becca.
I love seeing this update and that sweet smile on Ben’s face. I have a feeling this is going to be one of those awesome stories he gets to tell in his own life, of how he was healed and loved by so many.
Friendship has been a rough road for me, and I’ve had a few along the way that haven’t proved to be what I thought. Honestly, that’s been hard. But, I’ve recently had someone invite me in … who texts just because and prays even when I don’t ask. It means the world to me. More than words can say.
Thank you, Tiffany! I do hope it’s a story that grows his faith in God and in people. We live in a hard world, and it’s better to navigate with friends. I’m glad you have a good friend right now, despite the hard part of friendship in the past. Thank you for showing up here faithfully. xo
I continue to be amazed at God’s grace in providing relationships where I least expect them! Here in the blogging community as well as in real life, God opens the door to fellowship in the gospel and the gritty reality of living life, and He makes so much beautiful out of people together, just showing up in faithfulness!
Yes – I’ve got some friendships that surprised me but I’m even more grateful for those! I’m glad you’re here, Michele!
Yay! I am so thankful that Ben is getting back to a bit of normal. Thank you, Jesus!
As you know, we’ve had a great deal of crazy at Casa Dunbar over the last few years, and I don’t think I would have made it without my friends who pray and show up and press in. They are the hands and feet of Jesus to me on hard days.
Love you, brave mama. May God give you an extra measure of His strength as you continue to surround Ben with love.
I’m so glad you have those kind of friends, Lyli! Praying, showing up and pressing in are the best parts of community. Thank you for your encouragement.
I love seeing how friends and community come together to bless each other, and especially at such a scary time for you all. I am thankful to also experience that when I went into labor with no family around and the husband was hours away from work and not able to make it in time. I am thankful for the many times we have moved and people would help us pack and unpack. Life isn’t meant to be done alone!
Life is most certainly meant to be lived together. I’m so glad you’ve had some of those community experiences too. I’m glad you’re here, Jennie!
I enjoyed your article and so good to hear how your son is healing from his burns. The idea of community and the blessing of friendship aids in making this experience to be uplifting and strengthening to your faith. May the Lord continue to use your words and your interaction with others to bring light and joy to others. I would enjoy reading the book, “Never Unfriended.” As a person who has been “unfriended” by a dear friend, I need some affirmation from this reading.
Thank you, Kathy! I’m glad you could be encouraged here.
Amazing to me that you found time/emotional energy to write at all – and so well. I’ll share this on my hospitality FB group page (you are invited welcomeheart, welcomehome) – “People talk about friendship taking two people, but it really just takes one to invite the other.”
So glad you are being loved on in so many practical ways. S.
I needed to write to help process. So I decided to share this part. 🙂 Thank you for sharing it, Sue!
If it wasn’t for this elderly lady that my husband used to do yard work for we would be homeless right now for she took us into her house
Friendship certainly can be life changing. Thanks for sharing, Noelle.
May your precious boy continue to recover completely.
Blessed post. Perhaps these were just the words I needed today – “People talk about friendship taking two people, but it really just takes one to invite the other.”
Thank-you Kristin. Glad to be visiting.
I’m glad you could be encouraged, Jessica!