When I met Greg 19 years ago (TODAY, officially!), I didn’t think about what our marriage would be like. We dated throughout college and then got married 15 months after I graduated from college, the summer before his last year of law school. I figured our marriage would be good – I mean, what else would I think heading into this lifelong commitment?
Just thinking and expecting things to be one way isn’t enough.
Our hardest years of marriage in the 14 ½ years we’ve been husband and wife came early on. I didn’t understand why he did things the way he did and he didn’t understand my (over) reactions. I didn’t like all the piles of paper he like to sit beside his side of the bed and on the kitchen counter. I wanted to talk and process things with him while he wanted to talk once he had things sorted in his head. We’re both extroverts – but I’m lesser so according to every personality test I’ve ever taken. He didn’t understand how I could go and go but then need to stop.
In “No More Perfect Marriages,” Jill and Mark Savage open up their own story to show readers that God made each of us unique with our personalities and preferences, yet He unifies couples as one. I found such freedom in that and reflected on my own marriage.
“There are no perfect marriages, but there is a God who wants to ‘perfect’ us through this thing called marriage. When that happens, we get to experience the freedom of being real together.”
– From “No More Perfect Marriages”
This is the kind of book I wish I’d had earlier in my marriage. And, of course, even after more than 14 years, we can still learn from each other and about each other as we’re working on our relationship together.
“No More Perfect Marriages” is the third in a series from Jill Savage, who also has written “No More Perfect Moms” (2013) and “No More Perfect Kids” (2014). There is the obvious theme of letting go of perfection that runs among them all, but each one offers practical insights to the given topic. They’re all worth reading and applying to your life.
About the book
In “No More Perfect Marriages,” the Savages speak honestly about their struggles, how they came back from betrayal, and the principles keeping their marriage strong. In their warm, honest, personable style, Jill and Mark discuss how the Perfection Infection invades a marriage – even a good marriage; how to detect and correct the slow fades; how to set and communicate realistic expectations; what to do if your spouse just won’t change; how to guard your marriage from the Perfection Infection for good.
“No More Perfect Marriages” is a 272-page paperback published by Moody Publishers (Feb. 2017).
About the authors
Mark and Jill Savage are passionate about encouraging, educating, and equipping families. After serving in church ministry for 20 years, the Savages are meeting the needs of families as authors and speakers through Hearts at Home, a ministry to moms she founded in 1994. The parents of five adult children and grandparents of three, the Savages make their home in central Illinois.
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I received an advanced PDF copy of this book to review in exchange for being on the launch team and sharing about this book. These opinions are my own – and I’m going to gift it to some of the people I know getting married this year.
This books sounds like one I would like to read and apply the principles to strengthen my marriage. Your insights from the book help me realize that I must find more ways to lower my expectations and be open to the suggestions my husband requests.
You’re not alone in needing to lower expectations. I hope you get to read the book and find it as encouraging as I did. Thanks for being here, Kathy!