Lately I’ve found myself apologizing to people: I’m sorry I haven’t been on the computer much, but here’s that thing I told you I would send. I’m sorry I missed your call, I was doing this with my kids. I’m sorry for the delay, but we had a busy weekend together.
I need to stop that. As soon as the words are out of my mouth, I hear it: I’m telling them I’m sorry because I was doing my first and most important calling. That shouldn’t require an apology. Obviously, I’m also a believer in doing what I say I will do and helping people, but even those good things have wrecked my priorities, at least in my heart.
While thinking about this – especially as I read “The Happiness Dare” by Jennifer Dukes Lee, “Falling Free” by Shannan Martin, “Present Over Perfect” by Shauna Niequist – I remembered my husband, my kids, and even myself are part of God’s kingdom. To serve them – and, yes, even myself sometimes – well means I am serving God and his people.
[bctt tweet=”Ministry begins at home. #ThreeWordWednesday” username=”kristinhtaylor”]
This idea that ministry truly does begin at home has been plastered on billboards in my life. It keeps coming up in conversations with my friends. I’ve been reading about it in books and The Book, even when I didn’t expect the message to go there.
“You don’t have to sacrifice your spirit, your joy, your soul, your family, your marriage on the altar of ministry. Just because you have the capacity to do something doesn’t mean you have to do it. Management, organization, speaking and traveling: you must ask not only what fruit they bring to the world, but what fruit they yield on the inside of your life and your heart.”
{Shauna Niequist in “Present Over Perfect”}
I certainly don’t think our service and love should stop at the walls of our house, but I do believe it begins here and then overflows beyond. There are so many voices screaming – often times not intentionally – just the opposite. There are always opportunities to do and give and go, but not all those opportunities are meant for me.
I want my days to reflect my priorities: God, husband, kids, other people, in that order.
Some days I worry more about what chores my kids have finished and what their behavior has said about them than the condition of their hearts. Some days I judge my worth based on my productivity and give myself points for the number of errands and chores I can successfully complete. Too often my husband gets what energy is left over once the sun is setting, the dirty dishes are being dealt with, and the kids are being rushed off to bed.
Other days I serve my husband well and am kind to my kids. Some days I truly connect with people and don’t worry about my to-do list. Other days I see the mountains of laundry and the kitchen messes as opportunities to serve. And when my priorities are in order – both on my calendar and in my heart – then I’m always amazed that God seems to provide what I need to be a responsible adult. My house – and the people in it – are more at peace, even if there are still crumbs on the floor.
When my actions and attitude reflect my priorities, that peace and joy spill over beyond our family too. That’s ministry. That’s pursuing what matters. That’s kingdom work.
*****
I keep mentioning these books, I know. Nobody is telling me to do that, but I can’t get some of the message out of my head. I’ve written about “The Happiness Dare” here and “Falling Free” here. My post last week shared more about “Present Over Perfect” with some confessions from a fake-rest professional.
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I love being the first in line in the linkup!!!! #1 YAY! I haven’t even read your post yet but I know I’m going to love it because it is my advice to all young mom’s. YOUR FAMILY IS YOUR MINISTRY. Our kids need the guidance and care of their mom. Period. (Read my post IF YOU HAVE TIME, don’t if your kids need you first). And, I love photo collages.
Good job, Kristin, good job. xoxoxo
You’re such a sweet encourager. I’ll read your post soon. Thanks for being here (the first one!) and loving me well through the screen. xoxo
I’ve read it. Love it. Tweeted it. Pinned it. Good stuff. KINGDOM TALK.
Kingdom talk is what matters. I realize how lost it gets in my own life sometimes. God’s shaking things up for his good (and mine!) around here lately. Thanks for sharing. 🙂
Kristin beautiful words, and thanks for reminding us not to be sorry when we are ministering and being with family. We are in an older Bible study class and I find myself apologizing because we could not join them for Sunday lunch because we had our two toddler grandsons, and we won’t be a the monthly dinner at someone’s home because we are helping our niece clean out her Dad’s house, or I can’t substitute teach today because my daughter or DIL need me.
When our priorities are in order. Love that.
Thanks, Debbie! Those toddlers are blessed to have you. Enjoy your day!
People over projects has become my go to standard this summer. It’s true here in my home, but even at church, I was finding myself with a list of things to accomplish while I was there.
Oh, um, yes — and worship.
Thanks for holding onto truth, and sharing your journey with all of us who are also holding on for dear life!
Kristin, these words were a blessing to read this morning as I have been thinking and praying and prioritizing the last few days. Funny how that works 🙂 Thank you for sharing the quote from Shauna Niequist’s book as this was gold for me this morning> “you must ask not only what fruit they bring to the world, but what fruit they yield on the inside of your life and your heart.” Blessings!
That whole section in her book really rocked my perspective, in a good way! And, really, it went along with what God has been teaching me. I love that He knows I need repetition. So He just keeps repeating. 🙂 Thanks for encouraging and sharing and being here!
That boldface statement at the end of this post is a winner. I want to encourage out of the overflow of joy, not out of duty and drudge.
Me too, friend. That’s what I want. xoxo
So great, Kristin. I love your encouragement to not apologize for doing what we love vs. what we think we should. I’m a do what I say gal too, but I know I can often sacrifice myself on that altar. Your words are wise and timely, friend. xoxo
I’m learning to say yes to what I’m really called to do and not say yes just because I SHOULD or I want someone to like me. It’s a thin line, but it’s one God has been teaching me about. I’m glad you could be encouraged too. xoxo