Kristin Hill Taylor

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8 Ways to Find Alone Time as a Mom

April 30, 2015 by Kristin Leave a Comment

Alone time is important, but it’s not always easy to find. And personality matters. If you’re introvert, that alone time will need to come more often. Extroverts may want to go to dinner with friends.

Regardless, a mom is not just a mom. A mom is a wife, daughter, sister, friend, aunt too. Those roles are important too. Obviously, being a mom demands much time, but to do that well, we need to take care of ourselves too.

Earlier this month, I spent an entire Saturday at a retreat for adoptive moms. I’m was technically helping with the Hope That Binds retreat, but, seriously, what a gift this time was. And not just the time – the food and gifts and conversations filled up my soul.

“Jesus was intentional about finding time to refuel. He knew there were many demands upon his time and energy and he had to be a good steward of his body, soul, and mind. Nobody had to tell him, ‘Jesus, go rest.’ Instead he recognized his need to pull away from the crowds and find the refreshment he needed. 

As moms, we need to do the same. People and responsibilities demand much from us and we have to be good stewards of our body, soul, and mind. We can’t wait until we’re drained dry or until someone comes along and offers to watch our kids (like that happens very often!). Instead we have to learn to be proactive about our self-care so that we can be ready to meet the needs of our family.”

{Jill Savage in “Real Moms … Real Jesus”}

Here are some ideas to get time alone …

1. Don’t always work during naptime. The dishes can wait.

2. Hang out with your husband after the kids are in bed. Your marriage needs to be a priority.

3. Plan dinner out with a friend.

4. Dads don’t babysit – they hang out with their kids. My husband often headed up bath time in the evenings so I could sit down … or clean up the kitchen. {Praise God the kids can shower themselves now!}

5. Preschool is good for the momma soul.

6. Let grandparents spend time with your kids without you.

7. Swap childcare with friends. My friends and I had a babysitting coop for a season when our kids were toddlers and preschoolers. Two moms would watch kids for a few hours one day a month while the other moms could go do whatever – work, rest, lunch with grownups, appointments. We planned months in advance so the moms could make plans.

8. Get up earlier than your kids. I never do this, but, hey, I know people who do … 

Regardless, make sure you make time for yourself – somehow – and don’t feel guilty about doing so.

“Choosing yourself is not wrong. The longer you go without taking time for yourself, the more resentment will fester, exhaustion will set in, and you will have nothing left to give – to anyone. Guilt has no place in the decision to take care of yourself. 

This self-inflicted guilt is holding us hostage. It also drives a wedge between us and intimacy with the Father. We cannot let guilt block us from experiencing the freedom we have in Christ and all the blessings he has for us.”

{Jessica Turner in “The Fringe Hours: Making Time For You”}


As a mom, how do you find time – even small pockets of time – for yourself?

________________

Hey, mommas, consider both “Real Moms, Real Jesus” and “The Fringe Hours: Making Time for You” recommendations. They’re both packed with such practical advice. 

I’m linking this post with the Soli Deo Gloria Sisterhood Gathering, where Jen Ferguson encourages women well. 

Want more insights? “Peace in the Process: How Adoption Built My Faith & My Family” is available on Amazon. Like me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter, peek into my life on Instagram, follow 152 Insights at Bloglovin’, or subscribe to receive “Insights in Your Inbox.”

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Filed Under: adoption, books, friends, Fringe Hours, motherhood, Soli Deo Gloria

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About Me

Telling stories is my therapy and I love sharing them with friends on my porch.

The main characters in my stories are my entrepreneur husband, our high school girl who never forgets, our middle school boy who has no fear, and our joy-filled first-grade girl. As we live out our stories, we seek God as the author of them all.

Learn more about my story here.

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🎶 All throughout my history / Your faithfulness 🎶 All throughout my history / Your faithfulness has walked beside me / The winter storms made way for spring / In every season, from where I'm standing / I see the evidence of Your goodness / All over my life … 🎶 @joshbaldwin in “Evidence”

I love summer. But my summer has started off busy: appointments, book edits deadline, establish new habits with the kids at home. All that’s necessary and good, it just cuts into my down time beside the pool. 

Today we have two open gyms for our basketball players, my book study with a few friends, a new weekly high school girls’ book study at our house, and a monthly dad-son character study. 

I long for a little more white space on the calendar, but I also wouldn’t change a thing because the kids are only 16, 13, and 7 once. This summer will only be this summer once. And I’ve already learned time flies with big kids. 

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