Kristin Hill Taylor

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Trying to Trust God While Trying to Conceive

June 25, 2014 by Kristin Leave a Comment

Jen Ferguson connected online and then met in real life. I’m looking forward to the day we get to hang out in person again. For now, I’m grateful for what she’s doing over at Soli Deo Gloria Sisterhood, where she’s fostering a real life community. Part of its accessibility is resources like guest blog posts that encourage women walking through all sorts of difficult seasons. It’s important to know none of us are alone. 

I knew when she was asking for people to consider sharing their stories I wanted to write about our infertility journey that led us to adopt our two children. Today is the first installment on the hard years of infertility. The second part about adoption will publish on July 2.

________

I learned the hard way deciding I was “ready” to have a baby wasn’t enough to get pregnant.

In December 2004, I stopped taking birth control pills, thinking that giving those up was submitting myself to God’s will. My husband was already ready and was just waiting – quite patiently, I might add – for me to have a family.

I’ve never been much of a science-minded person. But I knew enough to know when I didn’t have a menstrual cycle for the six months after trashing my birth control pills, I wasn’t going to get pregnant. I called the doctor, who at the end of the appointment prescribed Clomid to help me ovulate.

I walked out of the doctor’s office with what seemed to be the tool I needed to get my way. I probably should have been more nervous about taking a fertility drug, but I was already desperate to fix this.

Somehow I was still shocked that this next step in life wasn’t that easy. For five months, Clomid helped me ovulate, according to many vials of blood work, but it also made me emotional – perhaps “crazy” is a better description – and strained my marriage. Even through the emotions, I was convinced this was all just part of trying to become a mom.

Between the doctor’s appointments and blood draws, I prayed, “God, please help us become pregnant.” I uttered those words six words over and over again – as friends were announcing their pregnancies, on the good days when I had hope, and on the hard days where I couldn’t figure out why I wasn’t getting my way.

{Read the rest over at Soli Deo Gloria Sisterhood, where real connections matter.}

________

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Filed Under: adoption, family, guest post, Soli Deo Gloria

Comments

  1. Katie Reid says

    June 25, 2014 at 1:31 pm

    Thank you for bravely sharing your story- it is needed!

    Reply
  2. KristinHillTaylor says

    June 25, 2014 at 8:08 pm

    Thanks for reading it and encouragement me, Katie!

    Reply

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About Me

Telling stories is my therapy and I love sharing them with friends on my porch.

The main characters in my stories are my entrepreneur husband, our ninth-grade girl who never forgets, our have-no-fear sixth-grade boy, and our joy-filled kindergarten girl. As we live out our stories, we seek God as the author of them all.

Learn more about my story here.

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I’m honestly surprised I didn’t read this book I’m honestly surprised I didn’t read this book sooner. I loved so much about it, but I did want some of her stories to be  less repetitive and offer more practical advice for living out “radical, ordinary hospitality.” Rosaria Butterfield defines hospitality like this as sharing what you have in real time, preparing to continually life this lifestyle, and bringing strangers in so they become neighbors who become family. 

I took notes throughout, but especially during the introduction. I came away with an appreciation that hospitality can involve lists, schedules, and habits. I felt encouraged, even if I thought the book could have been organized better to include practical tips and other people’s stories. 

#KHTreads #bookstagram #audiobooks #livingfaithfully #bookreview #booklover
Something I don’t usually share (online) … I Something I don’t usually share (online) …

I am an opinionated person, but I don’t usually share political opinions on social media. People who know me in real life know I value being pro-life, having less government involvement in our everyday lives, defining marriage as God intended it, and being fiscally conservative. As a former newspaper reporter, I still get excited about elections. I admittedly pay a little less attention in the almost 15 years I haven’t been in a newsroom. But I still care and have plenty of opinions. 

I voted today in Kentucky’s Primary Election. I’m thankful for the freedom to share my opinion by darkening some blocks on a paper ballot. 

#OneDayMay #maydays #reallife #livingfaithfully
Old friends and live music are two of my favorite Old friends and live music are two of my favorite things, so having them together is the best. My friend Aaron and I went to multiple Dave Matthews Band shows together during our college years, so now two decades later it’s fun to do it again as grown ups with our spouses for a band that speaks truth into our lives. 

@needtobreathe put on the loudest acoustic tour I’ve ever seen, but it sure was good! And its encore of completely unplugged songs was especially sweet. 

#NTBlive #needtobreathe #bettertogether #choosingJOY #favoritethings #livingfaithfully #weekending
Happiness is … … a slow morning that gave me Happiness is …

… a slow morning that gave me a chance to finish reading a good book right after I fixed my favorite cinnamon toast. 

… some shade to invite me to pick some more weeds around the house. But why doesn’t my Apple Watch count this as exercise? It felt like exercise to me! 

… an appointment with my oldest girl for us both to get our nails done this morning. 

… my youngest girl’s last soccer game of the season, even though the heat made her a little grumpy. 

… pool time, another good book to read, my mom visiting for the second weekend in a row, a little more weeding, and a night at home with no specific plans. 

Happiness is everyday, normal life with my people, especially when it comes with a slower pace after a hectic week. 

#OneDayMay #maydays #soccermom #KHTreads #momlife #weekending #choosingJOY #livingfaithfully #poolpeople #PorchStories
I regretted having to go to sleep last night befor I regretted having to go to sleep last night before I finished this book, so I picked it up at breakfast and didn’t do anything else until I finished it. 

I loved the Alaskan cruise setting, the quick love and understanding between Greta and Ben, and the realistic ways grief changes people. Well done, @jenniferesmith! 

#KHTreads #bookstagram #kindlebooks #booklover #kindlepaperwhite #reallife #weekending #recommendedreads #poolpeople #amreading
Happy Friday! 🎉 We’ve got four more days of s Happy Friday! 🎉 We’ve got four more days of school next week and then it’s #88daysofsummer! Obviously, we’re ready. ☀️ 

Here’s to a refreshing weekend with much anticipation of what’s to come! #weekending #choosingJOY #livingfaithfully #thirdchild #momlife #summerisbest #poolpeople #PorchStories #maydays
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ I’ve already bou ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I’ve already bought three copies of “Glad You’re Here: Two Unlikely Friends Breaking Bread and Fences” by @walkerhayes and @craigallencooper to gift to specific friends. I’ve referenced this story in conversations this week and will likely recommended it for years to come. 

This story is about two seemingly different guys befriending each other because their kids were on the same baseball team and their wives became friends. They kept showing for each other, encouraged each other, and changed each other for the better. In fact, their friendship was the catalyst for Walker deciding to follow Christ. 

Give me Applebee’s on a date night, a real-life story of how we are eternally better together, and an audiobook that makes me want to drive and I’m a happy girl. I’m fancy like that. 

#KHTreads #bookstagram #bettertogether #livingfaithfully #hospitalitymatters #audiobooks #booklover #favoritethings
I’m majorly behind on laundry, dishes, emails, a I’m majorly behind on laundry, dishes, emails, and to-do lists. Birthdays, a field trip, end-of-school things, squeezing in some friend dates, and just general life with three kids have occupied much of my time. But my friend @whitneyrscott at @blushsalon did tend to their shaggy hairs. So check! 

#momlife #reallife #girlmom #boymom #maydays #siblinglove #livingfaithfully
What I’m wearing … I don’t wear in jewelry, What I’m wearing …

I don’t wear in jewelry, but I love having bracelets that mean things to me. 

Today my friend Monica and I talked to our oldest daughters’ high school health class about adoption. My other friend @megandelaneythomas invited us because she recently taught about the reproductive system and wanted the class to hear about adoption as an option. We talked about adoption as a process, redemption to broken circumstances, and picture of God grafting us into his family. We shared resources and advice on counseling for abortion, befriending people who have made different relationships choices, and parenting regardless of how God builds a family. 

I left that high school health class thankful for @ncca.lions and the opportunities my kids have had to learn about real things in the context of the gospel. I’m also grateful for this adoption bond Monica and I share with our kids who are the same ages. I’ve always said, adoption is relational to its core, far beyond just bringing a baby home. That circle widened a little today, and I’m glad to welcome others into pieces of our story. 

Also, how fun are these bracelets @katie_cunningham85 gave me last week for my birthday? Today seemed like the perfect time to wear them along with my Romans 8:28 reminder — “And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.”

Things working together for the good in Christ doesn’t mean easy or convenient. But it does mean all the details and relationships matter. I’m forever grateful for how God built my faith and my family through adoption. Wearing these sweet reminders is good for my soul. 

#OneDayMay #maydays #adoptionislove #adoption #PeaceInTheProcess #authorlife #bettertogether #livingfaithfully #choosingJOY #momlife #firstborn #girlmom #boymom #reallife @scott_monica_bidwell
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