Kristin Hill Taylor

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How to Be a Good {Long-Distance} Friend

October 18, 2013 by Kristin Leave a Comment

College friends reunited in March 2012.

We have friends coming into town this weekend. One of the perks of living in our college town is friends coming back for Homecoming. This year our friend Kelly and her two daughters who are my kids’ ages are staying with us. I’m so grateful for these times of being able to catch up with people we don’t see enough of in our everyday lives.

Two weeks ago, I posted How to Be a Good {Local} Friend. Better late than never, here is the next installment for those of you needing inspiration on how to maintain the long-distance friendship.

1. Use Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and whatever else to spark real conversations. Those conversation may happen in emails, text messages, phone calls or Facebook messages, but go deeper than what’s happening in the public profile of your chose technology, ask questions, swap stories or continue previous conversation on a personal level. {Holly and I have had real-life conversations in hundreds of emails.} Maintaining long-distance friendships is certainly aided greatly by technology, but you still have to make an investment.

2. Send care packages and real mail. Yes, do it for birthdays or other special dates. But also do it just because you two once bonded over the deliciousness of circus peanuts, share a special love for those seasonal Brach’s Chick and Bunnies, and happen upon a bag of this candy while grocery shopping. Yes, that’s a specific example from my life, right, Katie? It doesn’t have to involve candy. You could send cards or photos or gifts.

3. Invite them over. Long-distant friends may not be conveniently located in your same town, but you can still invite them over. Get dates on the calendar and make plans.

4. Be willing to go see them. When we go on a road trip, often prompted by a particular event, I try to schedule dates with other friends who live in that area. It doesn’t mean I can always see everyone I hope to see, but it’s worth trying.

5. Tell your kids about these friends. My kids adore a few of my out-of-town friends. So when we do get to see them, they’re just as excited as I am. Seeing my kids befriend my long-time friends’ kids who live other places is one of the greatest joys of motherhood. And they adore the grown-up friends too when they know they’re like family.

6. If you can’t be there physically, send something. When my father-in-law passed away unexpectedly a few years ago, some friends journeyed to our small town to grieve our loss and celebrate his life with us. Others couldn’t be here, which is understandable, but they sent flowers, pictures frames, cards and texts of prayers.

What else do you do to keep in touch with your long-distance friends?

________

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Filed Under: community, friends

Comments

  1. KristinHillTaylor says

    October 20, 2013 at 9:17 pm

    Thanks, Beth! Yes, real mail is always good. 🙂 Hoping God provides plenty of ways for you and your husband to communicate while he's away.

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Telling stories is my therapy and I love sharing them with friends on my porch.

The main characters in my stories are my entrepreneur husband, our high school girl who never forgets, our middle school boy who has no fear, and our joy-filled first-grade girl. As we live out our stories, we seek God as the author of them all.

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To live in communion with one another, means to sh To live in communion with one another, means to share meals, space, advice, and prayers. It also means sharing hope, disappointment, dreams, and forgiveness. 

We explore what this looks like in “Created for Communion,” along with other biblical foundations for friendships and community.

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So many of my Facebook friends shared lovely pictu So many of my Facebook friends shared lovely pictures of their daughters yesterday for the completely made-up National Daughters Day. Regardless, today I'm all in my feelings about my daughters. 

They're 16 and 8 right now. Both of their classes have been studying ancient Egypt and had a joint feast today. Sweet, huh? 

BUT THEN TIMEHOP GOT ME! Apparently, NINE years ago today, when Cate was a second-grader, her class had an Egyptian feast. I think about a particular picture of Cate and her friend Kilee from that day AND THEN IT CAME UP IN MY TIMEHOP TODAY. Facebook also told me that same day nine years ago, Monica and I became Facebook friends. We probably were at the Egyptian feast and decided we'd be friends because our girls were friends. Y'all, God has been so good to me through my friendship with Monica. Our families click in a special way with our three sets of same-aged kids, most of whom have been adopted. 

Anyway, my daughters. They're lovely, funny, and smart. I love that Cate helped Rachel with her Egyptian eye makeup this morning and made her a Nutella and banana sandwich. I love that they got to have a party today at school together. I love that even though they're eight years apart, they're sisters. 

I hope you enjoy these pictures as much as I do. 💛

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I’m pretty much always thinking about my next tr I’m pretty much always thinking about my next trip! Be it a weekend getaway or a family vacation, I’ve always got ideas of where I want to go next. The rest of my family always has suggestions too. Yes, take the (next) trip!

In the blog post HOW TO TAKE THE TRIP, I share lots of links and suggestions on where to go, who can help you, and what to take with you. 

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I was thankful for some rest time on the couch on I was thankful for some rest time on the couch on Saturday afternoon — and a chance to finish this suspense book. 

“Between Two Strangers” by @katewhite_author had such an intriguing plot that pulled me right in. I was close to figuring out how it was all intertwined, but I didn’t quite get there through all the twists. Good, quick read!

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Recently, in random snapshots. This is a full life Recently, in random snapshots. This is a full life, but it’s a good life. 💛

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You’re a light wherever you go! And you like to You’re a light wherever you go! And you like to go! You’re always making friends, asking about our next adventure, wanting to know what’s next, and talking if you’re not singing. You’re the joy our family needed in 2015 and you continue to be the one who makes us laugh and love better than we did before we knew you. 

... You ask a million questions, know the words to thousands of songs, have so many ideas, and still try to sneak into my bed at night. You say I’m the best snuggler in this family. I’ll take it – and your hugs and love, although the middle of the night will never be my favorite time. 

Happy birthday to the girl who loves loudly! 

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In this book about biblical friendships, we’ll l In this book about biblical friendships, we’ll learn how God has created us for communion, allowing His people—then and now—to befriend one another in holy ways.

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