I know it gets old saying no.
No, we’re not going to watch that movie.
No, the pool isn’t open yet.
No, we aren’t doing that craft right now.
No, we’re not going to watch another episode of “My Little Pony.”
No, we’re not going back to the snow cone place. We already went there once today.
No …
Sometimes the nos come because of circumstances completely out of my control. Other times they come because everybody does need boundaries. Somehow boundaries create freedom. Some nos are completely necessary. But some of my nos are because I don’t want to be inconvenienced or interrupted.
Motherhood is going to make us weary. We are party planners, personal shoppers, chefs, taxi drivers, housekeepers, wives, friends, neighbors … all at the same time. It’s big job. It’s a high calling.
But sometimes we don’t have to say no. I’m telling this to myself.
I was reminded yesterday that letting your kids run and jump and splash and sit in a muddy puddle can be fun for them and freeing for momma. Yes, it created dirty clothes and dirty kids. Yes, I had to help them out of their wet clothes that clung to their bodies right there on someone else’s farm. I brought dry clothes, but I didn’t think about towels.
You see, I knew muddy puddles were likely going to be in our path when Jaclyn and I decided to take our five kids in five years to pick strawberries the day after some storms. So I packed the extra clothes, thinking I may need them if they got dirty and wet picking berries. Turns out, the berry plants sitting on higher ground weren’t really surrounded by water.
Oh but there were puddles nearby.
They walked on in and we didn’t stop them.
Then we picked berries …
Before we left, they went back into the puddle. But it was more than walking through this time. It was jumping and splashing and sitting and twirling and chasing.
This picture above captures more of who I want to be as a mom. It’s a weary job sometimes, but I want to say yes. I want to speak with a softer, kinder voice. I want to remember we don’t always have to be in a hurry to get to the next thing. I want to let them jump and make messes. Yes, I want to teach them truth and problem-solving strategies. Yes, I want them to learn responsibility. But I want them to live joyfully.
I didn’t exactly want to touch my dirty kids. But we accomplished our mission: 8.6 pounds of strawberries and some adventure along the way. And you know what? I felt less weary after letting go.
Mommas, we can do this. We can teach truth and allow adventure. We can foster independence and create boundaries. We can work and play. We can sit and run. We can encourage responsibility and let them explore. We can let them live.
I’m linking up with Hope For the Weary Mom today. If you want even more encouragement, “No More Perfect Moms” by Jill Savage is available at Amazon for $10.38 {paperback} or $7.76 {Kindle} and “Hope For the Weary Mom” by Stacey Thacker and Brooke McGlothin is available at Amazon for $4.49 {paperback and Kindle}. Affiliate links included.
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I love this. "This picture above captures more of who I want to be as a mom. It's a weary job sometimes, but I want to say yes. I want to speak with a softer, kinder voice. I want to remember we don't always have to be in a hurry to get to the next thing. I want to let them jump and make messes. Yes, I want to teach them truth and problem-solving strategies. Yes, I want them to learn responsibility. But I want them to live joyfully."
I am learning more and more to be a yes mom. I don't have adaptability or spontaneity as a strength, but that doesn't mean I can't learn how to be free. I too, want my children to live joyfully!
Thank you for your sweet words here. Those aren't my strengths either, but God is showing me that with him ALL things really are possible. I'm slowly catching on! 🙂
Kids and puddles what is it that draws them to them? So cute, and the "fruit" of your "yes" is the smiles and the memories. So sweet! Love it!
Thanks, Stacey!
I've been internalizing pretty much what you've written here. Of course, my nurturing has different faces (running a couple businesses, a part-time job, a litter of puppies), but the weariness and the not-wanting-to-let-go is the same. It's amazing what happens, though, when I loosen my grasp and allow what's supposed to be, be. I, for one, am much more content.
This is why you get me, even from hundreds of miles away.