Hometown Bachelor

I’ve watched a few [OK, several …] seasons of “The Bachelor” and “The Bachelorette.” And, I have to say, I love the hometown dates. I love seeing the other towns and cities, and I like to see what “real life” does to the relationships that are fostered in a romantic bubble.

So, moving on to my commentary I jotted down during tonight’s episode of “The Bachelor” …

First up, Chantal in Seattle. I’ve been to Seattle. And I like Seattle. After their hometown date, Chantal is my second favorite girl left. During the date, Chantal kept talking about how huge this hometown date is. Agreed. Then they walked into her parents’ house. Um, that’s what’s HUGE about this episode. Literally. Just look at the front door alone. It’s so, so tall. And there’s a “self-made man” statue. Oh, and there is much, much, much wine.

I liked learning about Madawaska, Maine, as much as I liked listening to Ashley say she’s confident now. I detect more disconnect coming. But, first, what do you know … Ashley, the dental student who isn’t actually a dentist yet, made the short list of notable Madawaska people on Wikipedia. Of course, there are more moose than people there.

My other favorite part of Ashely’s hometown date was her tattooed sister, who talked about heart bursting using hand motions.

Shawntel was a little creepy in Chico, CA. Of course, she is a funeral director in a family who owns the funeral home. So I suppose it was appropriate the family’s funeral home commercial opened her segment. And, you know, that organ music that played next would make me scared of anything, including death.

Brad may not have heard the creepy organ music, but he did see the fiery crematory. Then he said, “Can I follow you, where it says ‘danger’?” And then he laid on an embalming table.

She totally dropped the not-running-the-family-business-because-of-love conversation bomb at the dinner table. Not cool. And then Dad was pretty blunt about her leaving would affect the community. Nothing like a guilt trip before blessing the relationship and hypothetical forthcoming marriage.

Saved the best for last. Emily in Charlotte. And her 5-year-old daughter, Ricki.

Brad was so patient with Ricki and isn’t scared of that most important part of Emily’s life. And Emily was so brave to let Brad in her life like that. Their date was so real. They even played Candy Land and cooked together. Then Emily had to be patient while Brad sorted out some weird your-kid-is-upstairs-sleeping-so-I-won’t-kiss-you-goodbye thing in his own head.

My preferred pecking order would be Ashley to go next, then Chantal, and then the relationship that doesn’t end with Emily. We’ll see what Brad thinks, continuing next week in South Africa.